I've considered quitting writing
but the words they just won't stop;
sometimes I just write nonsense
and it's a total flop.
Sometimes I get excited,
about the melodies words bring.
Then I often realise
they don't mean anything.
Valentine's Day Card
I fell in love, with you, my friend.
I fell in love but that's not the end.
You took my heart, and you tore it apart,
ripped it to shreds, until I was dead.
So I won't be sending a card this year,
because why do you deserve any cheer?
I fell in love but that's not the end.
You took my heart, and you tore it apart,
ripped it to shreds, until I was dead.
So I won't be sending a card this year,
because why do you deserve any cheer?
New Year Resolutions?
We're all resolved,
our plans are made
but as the cold draws on
hopes start to fade.
Thoughts of slimming and romance
turn to duvet days and fags,
the world outside rejected
in favour of sweeties in bags.
The gym is a distant memory,
replaced by cooking stodgy stews.
By the time Spring hits
we've forgotten our old views.
Resolutions are hidden
in the back of our minds,
we no longer care
about bettering out lives.
Until the year draws to an end
and we look at last years list,
we hang our head in shame
and ball the paper in our fist.
Then on new years day
we start over again,
preparing to get healthy,
to rescue ourselves from pain.
We dream of lots of good days,
knowing bed behaviour never pays,
and we prepare for the perpetual cycle
to start all over again.
our plans are made
but as the cold draws on
hopes start to fade.
Thoughts of slimming and romance
turn to duvet days and fags,
the world outside rejected
in favour of sweeties in bags.
The gym is a distant memory,
replaced by cooking stodgy stews.
By the time Spring hits
we've forgotten our old views.
Resolutions are hidden
in the back of our minds,
we no longer care
about bettering out lives.
Until the year draws to an end
and we look at last years list,
we hang our head in shame
and ball the paper in our fist.
Then on new years day
we start over again,
preparing to get healthy,
to rescue ourselves from pain.
We dream of lots of good days,
knowing bed behaviour never pays,
and we prepare for the perpetual cycle
to start all over again.
Hollow shadow
A shadow of a man,
a hollow unfilled shell.
They both lack depth,
they both fail to be.
There's nothing beyond the surface,
no hopes or fears or dreams.
They are what they are
and that's all they can see.
a hollow unfilled shell.
They both lack depth,
they both fail to be.
There's nothing beyond the surface,
no hopes or fears or dreams.
They are what they are
and that's all they can see.
Blossoming disappointment
Disappointment
is like a flower,
it blossoms in its beauty
and dies at the first sight of frost.
A building hope
that falls back down,
like a dream
waking up to reality.
is like a flower,
it blossoms in its beauty
and dies at the first sight of frost.
A building hope
that falls back down,
like a dream
waking up to reality.
Broken Ending
Why is life so fragile?
Why does it easily break?
How do we hold it together?
How do we know what's not fake?
Does anyone get a happy ending,
when an ending means something has gone?
How do we know what's forever?
And what's just about to go wrong?
Why does it easily break?
How do we hold it together?
How do we know what's not fake?
Does anyone get a happy ending,
when an ending means something has gone?
How do we know what's forever?
And what's just about to go wrong?
Consumed creeping
Physically ill,
the ache creeps over me,
quieted
only by you.
I used to want,
now I need
you.
Scared.
It threatens to
consume
so often now.
I am controlled by it,
not it by me.
This love
brings tears
and happiness,
we can't choose which.
the ache creeps over me,
quieted
only by you.
I used to want,
now I need
you.
Scared.
It threatens to
consume
so often now.
I am controlled by it,
not it by me.
This love
brings tears
and happiness,
we can't choose which.
Desires
Handbags on shoulders
and clutches in fingers,
high heels
and low heels
and flat shoes with bows.
Boxes and pouches
filled with bangles and rings,
these are just some
of my desired things.
and clutches in fingers,
high heels
and low heels
and flat shoes with bows.
Boxes and pouches
filled with bangles and rings,
these are just some
of my desired things.
Appreciate This - an exerpt
She sat, illuminated by the lamppost, tapping her French painted fingernails on the steering wheel. Five minutes ago she'd sped into the car park at 40mph preparing her apology. As it turned out she wasn’t the late one, despite never wearing a watch.
She observed the casual way he rolled into the space next to her and turned off his engine. As usual she unlocked her doors, climbed out, relocked the doors behind her, and climbed into his red Golf, noting the attentive cleanness. He leant over and swept his lips against hers, a habitual gesture, with no passion.
“So,” he smiled, raising his dark eyebrows, “I presume, as we are on neutral ground, I’ve done something wrong?”
She observed the casual way he rolled into the space next to her and turned off his engine. As usual she unlocked her doors, climbed out, relocked the doors behind her, and climbed into his red Golf, noting the attentive cleanness. He leant over and swept his lips against hers, a habitual gesture, with no passion.
“So,” he smiled, raising his dark eyebrows, “I presume, as we are on neutral ground, I’ve done something wrong?”
Against expectations
The garish bride was upstaged by the simple silhouettes of the bridesmaids, whose usually death like complexions were transformed.
Secret
A drop of gold
on a burning candle,
locked away in a silken drawer
for eternity,
how long it may.
on a burning candle,
locked away in a silken drawer
for eternity,
how long it may.
When past and present combine
Things seem to be just perfect,
like magic in the air.
The history of romance
re-written for a pair.
Then,
like a cloud,
old feelings come back to haunt you,
swirling you into a whirlwind,
where colours and faces merge.
Some things never fade.
When things change
you can't go back.
The confusion you'll find
once past and present combine.
The opposite of nothing,
too many feelings found.
A choice to be made
and kept for all time.
No going back on your word.
like magic in the air.
The history of romance
re-written for a pair.
Then,
like a cloud,
old feelings come back to haunt you,
swirling you into a whirlwind,
where colours and faces merge.
Some things never fade.
When things change
you can't go back.
The confusion you'll find
once past and present combine.
The opposite of nothing,
too many feelings found.
A choice to be made
and kept for all time.
No going back on your word.
Lack of support
Always leaning forward,
never leaning back.
We strain to get closer,
forgetting to fear the attack.
By now we should know better
but passion always wins,
overtaking wisdom,
allowing us our sins.
never leaning back.
We strain to get closer,
forgetting to fear the attack.
By now we should know better
but passion always wins,
overtaking wisdom,
allowing us our sins.
Time
Times have changed,
and times have past.
There's more to come
it's not the last.
Each hug,
each cry,
each shoulder took,
will fade away.
But the memory,
that's here to stay.
and times have past.
There's more to come
it's not the last.
Each hug,
each cry,
each shoulder took,
will fade away.
But the memory,
that's here to stay.
Mixed Emotions
A match lit from the heart,
the fire of midnight sparkles
glisten for an eternity,
or just the moment.
When the light burns out,
clarity remains.
the fire of midnight sparkles
glisten for an eternity,
or just the moment.
When the light burns out,
clarity remains.
I don't believe
I don't believe in happy endings.
I don't believe in hope.
I don't believe in love,
because I no longer believe in you.
I don't believe in hope.
I don't believe in love,
because I no longer believe in you.
My partner and me
I have been wrapped up tightly in black leather all day. They are supposed to be functional, comfortable even, but I want freedom. I cannot breathe, beads of perspiration gather in my crevices, I need air. The cotton cloaking between me and the leather does nothing to soften the rubbing against my delicate surface. Some stand on spindly towers but I'm flat to the ground. I've seen others sway sensually in sexy stilettos or totter dangerously in daring platforms, but I am plain in my cow skin, mock cow skin. The pillars above squash me down. A dull ache throughout. Hands get paid while I suffer, my partner and me. Backwards and forwards, absorbing the impact. I long for the luxury of warm water to soak in. Soft skin blisters, while the rough gets rougher. I should be caressed, massaged, but she won't allow it because she is too busy.
My Angel
Time flowed by,
I was alone,
nothing could touch
the truth inside.
Until what I saw one day
changed me.
Now I know
what you went through.
We'll be together until the very end
my friend.
You mean so much to me
but now apart we must be.
You've moved on
but I can't let go.
I'll hold onto the past,
to you,
hold onto the memories,
which will never die,
they'll remain with me
for as long as I shall be.
I was alone,
nothing could touch
the truth inside.
Until what I saw one day
changed me.
Now I know
what you went through.
We'll be together until the very end
my friend.
You mean so much to me
but now apart we must be.
You've moved on
but I can't let go.
I'll hold onto the past,
to you,
hold onto the memories,
which will never die,
they'll remain with me
for as long as I shall be.
Happy Birthday
Soft lies are told while dead hearts crawl
through forest caves bejeweled.
The crackle as stick snap underfoot the flame,
scarred flesh buried where eyes cannot see.
An ecstasy of flowing salt
frozen like snow flakes and kept for eternity.
Bruised and broken within.
Struggling sheets of ice slip.
Branches pinned back.
Gasps of wind mocking silence
within the cave unheard.
Beating drums hasten as the scream is sliced short.
Chained to the celebration
on the day you were born.
through forest caves bejeweled.
The crackle as stick snap underfoot the flame,
scarred flesh buried where eyes cannot see.
An ecstasy of flowing salt
frozen like snow flakes and kept for eternity.
Bruised and broken within.
Struggling sheets of ice slip.
Branches pinned back.
Gasps of wind mocking silence
within the cave unheard.
Beating drums hasten as the scream is sliced short.
Chained to the celebration
on the day you were born.
Fire Drops
We watch and wait.
Unclear is our fate,
kept within the dark one's gate.
Our fire burns beyond his grate.
Within his heart, shines loving hate.
Sure as rain drops' shining dew,
in our secret place, I'll wait for you.
Unclear is our fate,
kept within the dark one's gate.
Our fire burns beyond his grate.
Within his heart, shines loving hate.
Sure as rain drops' shining dew,
in our secret place, I'll wait for you.
Forgiven not Forgotten
I thought I could forget,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought that he was gone
but I was unaware.
I thought that it as over,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought I didn't love him
but I was unaware.
I thought it was a game,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought my eyes were open
but I was unaware.
I thought I had moved on,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought it wasn't meant to be
but I was unaware.
I thought I didn't care,
I thought that he was gone
but I was unaware.
I thought that it as over,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought I didn't love him
but I was unaware.
I thought it was a game,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought my eyes were open
but I was unaware.
I thought I had moved on,
I thought I didn't care,
I thought it wasn't meant to be
but I was unaware.
A drop of magic
A cut edge
sparkling through,
a drop of magic,
this perfect jewel.
No gold or silver
adorning you.
Just this magic drop,
sparkling through.
sparkling through,
a drop of magic,
this perfect jewel.
No gold or silver
adorning you.
Just this magic drop,
sparkling through.
It's Never Over
Each tear drop glistening in the blink of an eye,
a drop of heart ache to save for all time.
Truth's far more hurtful than any white lie.
Love's more poetic than any old rhyme.
Each small smile shining with the hope of a day,
a moment of joyful nothing forever to save.
The magic inside that I am giving away,
compared with loving another there's nothing so brave.
Each breath of thumping lovers heartbeat,
a crescendo of what each kiss meant.
The dust of time gone by, crushed beneath my feet.
My days alone are far from spent.
a drop of heart ache to save for all time.
Truth's far more hurtful than any white lie.
Love's more poetic than any old rhyme.
Each small smile shining with the hope of a day,
a moment of joyful nothing forever to save.
The magic inside that I am giving away,
compared with loving another there's nothing so brave.
Each breath of thumping lovers heartbeat,
a crescendo of what each kiss meant.
The dust of time gone by, crushed beneath my feet.
My days alone are far from spent.
The End
What's the use of trying
when trying never works?
What's the use of lying
when lying makes things worse?
What's the use in crying
when crying shows you're hurt?
It's times like these that you can see
some friendship is not so true.
It's times like these that you can feel
some people just done care.
It's times like these that you can hear
no-one is there to listen.
When all that hurt,
when all that loss,
when all that pain is gone.
Silence can no longer deafen
in the peace I lie.
No-one causes loneliness
in the peace I lie.
Coldness I'll no longer feel
in the peace I lie.
Standing on the edge of life,
preparing for the fall.
when trying never works?
What's the use of lying
when lying makes things worse?
What's the use in crying
when crying shows you're hurt?
It's times like these that you can see
some friendship is not so true.
It's times like these that you can feel
some people just done care.
It's times like these that you can hear
no-one is there to listen.
When all that hurt,
when all that loss,
when all that pain is gone.
Silence can no longer deafen
in the peace I lie.
No-one causes loneliness
in the peace I lie.
Coldness I'll no longer feel
in the peace I lie.
Standing on the edge of life,
preparing for the fall.
Memories
Memories should not be forgotten
or dragged up once again.
They remind you of the joy you had
or haunt you with sadness gone by.
Forgive but don't forget.
Remember but don't reminisce.
Collect but do not cry.
Life's too short to sit around and whisper
about what happened in the past.
Try to live with others beside you
and search to find the hope within yourself.
At last you'll see what's beyond the dark
can take as long as you or me,
can last as long as time,
as long as you remember.
Memories may be kept inside;
feelings you never knew you had.
Mysteries to those who seek
the secrets in your heart.
or dragged up once again.
They remind you of the joy you had
or haunt you with sadness gone by.
Forgive but don't forget.
Remember but don't reminisce.
Collect but do not cry.
Life's too short to sit around and whisper
about what happened in the past.
Try to live with others beside you
and search to find the hope within yourself.
At last you'll see what's beyond the dark
can take as long as you or me,
can last as long as time,
as long as you remember.
Memories may be kept inside;
feelings you never knew you had.
Mysteries to those who seek
the secrets in your heart.
All for the want of a little hair dye
There was such a woman could be see as fair
if not be judged by things to wear.
Draped down her back her straw blonde hair
but at the top there is black root,
not upstaged by over knee boot.
You can tell she's used to cars that hoot.
Skirt hitched up high,
legs reach the sky,
many stares from passers by.
Long, blood red nails,
painted while riding the rails.
She's accustomed to no end of males.
Part of her occupation.
No thought of her final destination.
Her next man is waiting at the station.
Daintily she flicks off an end of ash,
blood shot eyes suggest it's hash.
I'm thinking now not fair but trash.
I wonder if she died today,
if she'd be left there where she lay,
if she has friends but those who pay?
How did such a girl end up here?
Losing all that she held dear.
Each night she sleeps with many a tear
in the corner of her eye.
She'll not tell what makes her cry.
And all for the want of a little hair dye.
if not be judged by things to wear.
Draped down her back her straw blonde hair
but at the top there is black root,
not upstaged by over knee boot.
You can tell she's used to cars that hoot.
Skirt hitched up high,
legs reach the sky,
many stares from passers by.
Long, blood red nails,
painted while riding the rails.
She's accustomed to no end of males.
Part of her occupation.
No thought of her final destination.
Her next man is waiting at the station.
Daintily she flicks off an end of ash,
blood shot eyes suggest it's hash.
I'm thinking now not fair but trash.
I wonder if she died today,
if she'd be left there where she lay,
if she has friends but those who pay?
How did such a girl end up here?
Losing all that she held dear.
Each night she sleeps with many a tear
in the corner of her eye.
She'll not tell what makes her cry.
And all for the want of a little hair dye.
New Year
The seconds tick by,
days, weeks, a month.
Moments to be savoured,
as each one flies so fast,
swooping, swallows singing
songs of days gone past.
Ebony tear trails may trickle
but tomorrow never dies.
Looking to the future,
tomorrow you start your life.
Seconds tick by,
your years on the clock.
days, weeks, a month.
Moments to be savoured,
as each one flies so fast,
swooping, swallows singing
songs of days gone past.
Ebony tear trails may trickle
but tomorrow never dies.
Looking to the future,
tomorrow you start your life.
Seconds tick by,
your years on the clock.
All these words I couldn't say
So many things to tell you,
and now its finally time.
I’ve waited far too long to say
I can’t let time pass me by.
Each word I’ll say is true,
listen hard to every line.
In this game I’ve had to play
there've been tears shed for each lie.
The sadness and confusion,
the sweetness and the sighs.
Deceive yourself you can’t deceive me,
in your cold hearted illusion.
The truth is in your eyes.
Things can’t stay the way they are,
it’s all or nothing.
You’ve never really loved me,
I guess it’s over now.
I’ve been used and abused by you
so much it makes me cry.
All these words I couldn’t say.
Someone else will when I'm gone.
and now its finally time.
I’ve waited far too long to say
I can’t let time pass me by.
Each word I’ll say is true,
listen hard to every line.
In this game I’ve had to play
there've been tears shed for each lie.
The sadness and confusion,
the sweetness and the sighs.
Deceive yourself you can’t deceive me,
in your cold hearted illusion.
The truth is in your eyes.
Things can’t stay the way they are,
it’s all or nothing.
You’ve never really loved me,
I guess it’s over now.
I’ve been used and abused by you
so much it makes me cry.
All these words I couldn’t say.
Someone else will when I'm gone.
What a cliche
It was raining cats and dogs, coming down in buckets. When it rains it always pours. My head was hot enough to fry an egg on, despite the rain.
My father always told me that money can't buy you happiness but he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. I have to work a little harder to make ends meet. I had an amazing new plan to bring home the bacon. After all, money doesn't grown on trees.
So I picked a few pockets and was laughing all the way to the bank. Nobody's perfect. It was a piece of cake, easy as pie.
I rushed home to the little woman. I'd never tried to pull the wool over her eyes and she never got bent out of shape about my career choice. I guess love is blind, even when you don't see eye to eye.
My father always told me that money can't buy you happiness but he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. I have to work a little harder to make ends meet. I had an amazing new plan to bring home the bacon. After all, money doesn't grown on trees.
So I picked a few pockets and was laughing all the way to the bank. Nobody's perfect. It was a piece of cake, easy as pie.
I rushed home to the little woman. I'd never tried to pull the wool over her eyes and she never got bent out of shape about my career choice. I guess love is blind, even when you don't see eye to eye.
Salsa
Toes tapping and heels clicking we learnt our lesson. Spanish dancing with Latin footsteps. Spinning and sliding across terracotta tiles. Twisting and turning together. Sashaying, softly stepping, then stomping our feet. Hips shaking, fingers snapping, circling ever onwards.
Ice Fire Steel
My blood is blue.
I am no royal.
I'm made of steel.
I bleed like you.
I can be broken.
I'm not a toy.
I am not dead.
I bleed like you.
I'm hard and soft.
I'm cold all over.
I am a snowstorm.
I am a fire.
I'll burn you quickly.
I'm made of steel.
I have a heart.
I have yours too.
I'll steal your breath
like you stole mine.
It's not a game.
The stab of steel.
The slice of ice.
I am the frost.
I crush.
I crunch.
I often kill.
You tore my soul.
The snow was melting.
I am not dead.
I am not frozen.
I can be broken
but not by you.
I am no royal.
I'm made of steel.
I bleed like you.
I can be broken.
I'm not a toy.
I am not dead.
I bleed like you.
I'm hard and soft.
I'm cold all over.
I am a snowstorm.
I am a fire.
I'll burn you quickly.
I'm made of steel.
I have a heart.
I have yours too.
I'll steal your breath
like you stole mine.
It's not a game.
The stab of steel.
The slice of ice.
I am the frost.
I crush.
I crunch.
I often kill.
You tore my soul.
The snow was melting.
I am not dead.
I am not frozen.
I can be broken
but not by you.
Empty Deep
An ache
so deep,
so excruciatingly deep,
that grows,
grows roots at wind in deeper.
Eroding sanity
until there's nothing left.
Nothing but depth and emptiness.
Emptiness that eats away
until you have the answer.
And that time never comes.
so deep,
so excruciatingly deep,
that grows,
grows roots at wind in deeper.
Eroding sanity
until there's nothing left.
Nothing but depth and emptiness.
Emptiness that eats away
until you have the answer.
And that time never comes.
Diving for Inspiration
Blazing reflections on the water
glaring into my eyes
so I cannot deny them.
Ducks diving for food,
their bottoms to the sky, symbolize
the upside down state of my
mind with me hopelessly
diving for inspiration.
I sit in the shadows
to shade myself.
The shade obscures the sun's
clarity from me.
How can I see so clearly
the meaning in the lake
but I am unable to see
my own meaning,
my own purpose.
glaring into my eyes
so I cannot deny them.
Ducks diving for food,
their bottoms to the sky, symbolize
the upside down state of my
mind with me hopelessly
diving for inspiration.
I sit in the shadows
to shade myself.
The shade obscures the sun's
clarity from me.
How can I see so clearly
the meaning in the lake
but I am unable to see
my own meaning,
my own purpose.
Extended Smoke
Step through the sizzle,
surrounded by oppressed,
scorched faces, staring back through mist and haze,
searching with gazes intense.
Sharp song notes suppress us,
smog blurs our view.
Singing of melodies softly blend in syndicate.
Stunned the audience enthuse.
Senses soothed by sensual harmonies as
stress seeps from the pores.
Swaying and mesmerized they dance,
stomping through the steam.
Strength fights the fog of fire and
silhouettes merge transparent,
stumbling in the fierceness.
Souls of a sensitive demeanor flee.
Sickening us the vapor chokes.
Shock shakes the figures.
Small paper cylinders produce
searing spirals of smoke.
surrounded by oppressed,
scorched faces, staring back through mist and haze,
searching with gazes intense.
Sharp song notes suppress us,
smog blurs our view.
Singing of melodies softly blend in syndicate.
Stunned the audience enthuse.
Senses soothed by sensual harmonies as
stress seeps from the pores.
Swaying and mesmerized they dance,
stomping through the steam.
Strength fights the fog of fire and
silhouettes merge transparent,
stumbling in the fierceness.
Souls of a sensitive demeanor flee.
Sickening us the vapor chokes.
Shock shakes the figures.
Small paper cylinders produce
searing spirals of smoke.
Lake Alone
Ripples circling
as a leaf touches the surface.
Gently, water waves at
the trailing Willows who gaze
as ducks
paddle by, then
open mouthed gold
fish bob to the surface and
in a shimmer fade away
between pink petals that protrude
from pads,
flat and green.
Squirrels scamper above the water
skittering up
the spiralled tree tops,
through which canopy
plump droplets patter and
slide down grass blades.
But on this battered old bench
tainted with green
I sit alone.
as a leaf touches the surface.
Gently, water waves at
the trailing Willows who gaze
as ducks
paddle by, then
open mouthed gold
fish bob to the surface and
in a shimmer fade away
between pink petals that protrude
from pads,
flat and green.
Squirrels scamper above the water
skittering up
the spiralled tree tops,
through which canopy
plump droplets patter and
slide down grass blades.
But on this battered old bench
tainted with green
I sit alone.
Awash in Reality
Soft tales are told of a romance so true;
courting lovers fantasies, the stars and moon,
sweet lies run black with blood red hue.
A passion for me that dies far too soon.
Illusions woven in the depth of night;
young maidens wait while their princes roam wild.
Storm clouds a’ brewing in my tortured heart
escape from these chains and start to fight
warm love cravings from a poor lonely child.
By nightmares my heart has been ripped apart.
Princes of darkness awash in their gloom
stripped they should be of their royal gold blue.
There’s no soul mate waiting out there for you.
To stay or to stray is my strongest plight,
can such heartbreak ever be reconciled?
Like a butterfly trapped inside cocoon
each story begins to lose its own start.
Soft tales not so soft for the hard at heart.
courting lovers fantasies, the stars and moon,
sweet lies run black with blood red hue.
A passion for me that dies far too soon.
Illusions woven in the depth of night;
young maidens wait while their princes roam wild.
Storm clouds a’ brewing in my tortured heart
escape from these chains and start to fight
warm love cravings from a poor lonely child.
By nightmares my heart has been ripped apart.
Princes of darkness awash in their gloom
stripped they should be of their royal gold blue.
There’s no soul mate waiting out there for you.
To stay or to stray is my strongest plight,
can such heartbreak ever be reconciled?
Like a butterfly trapped inside cocoon
each story begins to lose its own start.
Soft tales not so soft for the hard at heart.
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